The muddier side of politeness: Appropriation, control & enforcement

Resumen

Everyday politeness behaviour is all too often seen as unproblematic if interactants just adhere to the socially established norms and maxims of behaviour and remember to say their ‘pleases’ and ‘thank yous’. In developing and consolidating social relationships and engaging in amicable and cordial interaction, participants are expected to demonstrate respect, be tactful, show good manners and remain attentive to the needs of others. However, when engaging in politeness behaviour, interlocutors do not always participate on a level communicative playing field since they may have to negotiate class interests, confront individual self-interest and negotiate perceived hypocrisy. This can be seen as the murkier side of politeness and reflects the use and abuse of interpersonal and transactional power. This article examines how interactants negotiate politeness practices that are employed to appropriate, manipulate and enforce to achieve societal, group and personal objectives. To understand this murkier side of politeness, research has been undertaken with Mexican Spanish speakers who have been asked to reflect on how they navigate daily interpersonal and transactional encounters. The results indicate that far from reflecting routine and automatic responses, politeness behaviour is often evolving, dynamic and reactive depending on the individual social context.